Unhappy? You may be comparing yourself to others
Theodore Roosevelt famously said that comparison is the thief of joy. Often our dissatisfaction and unhappiness are rooted in comparing ourselves to others.
The Comparison Trap
Monitoring your inner voice
What is your inner voice telling you?
Seneca recounts the story of a fellow philosopher Crates walking the streets of Athens when he came upon a young man talking to himself. “What are you doing?”, he asked. The man replied, “I’m talking to myself”. “Be careful” said Crates, “for you are communicating with a bad man!”.
An interesting story which illustrates the importance of…
Allergies
Allergies: they’re more than physical
After walking out to my car the find a fresh yellow blanket of pollen, and sneezing so loudly I wondered if nearby drivers could hear me, allergies came to mind. Top of mind.
Allergies are our body’s immune system reacting abnormally to a foreign substance it sees as harmful. We are familiar with common allergies, but what about mental allergies? That is how we react to negative stimuli or situations in our environment.
One effective method is immunotherapy. Immunotherapy patients with severe pollen allergies have minute doses of the offending allergens introduced into their bodies in increasing doses over time until the body produces its own immunity. Applying this method to mental or emotional allergies has its merits as well. If you’re fearful of a specific situation, make it a point to place yourself in that circumstance and practice a new more effective response.
If you find yourself riddled with anxiety, begin to employ healthy methods to reduce and ultimately sooth your troubled mind. Are you continually vexed with rudeness, dishonesty or selfishness? Make it a point to eliminate all contact with toxic individuals whenever possible. Living with allergies is no fun, but doing nothing to treat them is even worse. What mental allergies do you encounter and how do you overcome them?
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The Stories We Tell Ourselves
Be wary of false narratives
Modern philosopher Nassim Taleb has warned of the “narrative fallacy”—the tendency to assemble unrelated events of the past into stories. These stories, however gratifying to create, are inherently misleading. What’s need is a strong sense of objectivity. A difficult task when it comes to ourselves, and perhaps our chosen profession. Yet, that objectivity is key to helping us take the steps toward improving our business, personal life, and even our health.
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A Phone Detox
Steps to overcoming phone addiction
In his New York Times column, Kevin Roose writes, “if you’re anything like me — and the statistics suggest you probably are, at least where smartphones are concerned — you have one, too”. He notes that unlike addictions that carry a stigma, such as alcohol or opiates, phone addiction is largely accepted. Accepting that his phone use was a problem he enlisted the help of Catherine Price, a fellow journalist, and author of “How to break up with your phone”- a 30-day guide to breaking phone habits.
Here are a few of Catherine’s techniques Kevin put into practice that we should perhaps consider…
Do Less
Pruning our daily routines
“If you seek tranquility, do less”, said Roman Emperor Marcus Aurelius. Note he didn’t say do nothing, just less. Less of what? Less of what matters least and more of what matters most.
This week’s challenge is to keep a time diary. Whether it’s on your computer, calendar or a notepad doesn’t matter. Just log down how your time is spent, including what you do when you get home- dinner, watching television, reading, etc. Next Friday review how you spent your time and ask yourself if this is your highest and best use of your time. Do our activities match my stated goals and values?
When we do less, what we do get’s better. Our remaining..
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6 Words to Ponder
Consider these words
What determines your reality? Why are constraints good for us? We examine these questions and more…
Set Your Priorities, Or Someone Else Will
It’s your plan or someone else’s
Priorities help you not only achieve your goals and objectives, but they also help you regain control of your life. Which do you prefer?
Under Pressure
The Value of Heat & Pressure
There’s no doubt most of us are under increasing heat and pressure in our careers as reverse mortgage professionals. What can we learn and how can we benefit?
Before you make your new year’s resolutions…
How to avoid the New Year’s resolution trap
I am bracing myself. For what? The fact that my once quiet gym will be crowded with those starting their New Year’s resolutions. The good news is that by February there should be plenty of room and machines to choose from during my early morning workout. All kidding aside, resolutions do hold some value but many fail.
The value of interruption
Sometimes it’s best to avoid January 1st as the start date of our resolution. Why? Once we have made the internal commitment to improving postponing taking action sends the unconscious message that ‘this too can wait.’ Those who have successfully quit smoking have shared that they made a point to throw away half of their last pack. Friends who have committed to losing weight often begin in the middle of the week or the middle of the month. The importance of pairing our decisions with immediate action is key to keeping our internal promises to ourselves.
Looking ahead to 2019 perhaps we should reconsider our approach to New Year resolutions.
