Caregivers often face burnout, especially when the elder for whom they’re responsible has dementia.
Continue readingOut of Money Due to A Health Emergency?
“So many people spend their health gaining wealth, and then have to spend their wealth to regain their health.” Variously attributed to A.J. Reb Materi and the Dalai Lama, these words ring true for those climbing the career ladder. But what happens when someone has diligently saved and invested, and loses it all due to a health crisis?
Sixty-eight-year-old Lynne FitzGerald is a prime example. Still young by today’s “senior” standards, FitzGerald found herself bereft of retirement savings after being diagnosed with stage-four colon cancer twelve years ago. Told she had a year to live, unable to work, and with a mortgage and a child in high school, FitzGerald liquidated her investments.
But she beat the odds, becoming a cancer survivor. Yet more than a decade on, she hasn’t been able to recoup her lost savings.
Face the Fear — and the Finances
“There is much to be said about tackling financial arrangements for elders, and what they can do to protect their assets and makes things easier upon their deaths or encroaching poor health,” observes one seasoned HECM loan originator, citing our recent post on the family money discussions that do not take place nearly often enough.
He continues, “As a former banker and investment adviser, plus through a lot of personal experience, I have learned much. When I do Reverses, I am able to touch upon this material in relaxed conversation, mixed in with the reverse product presentation. It shows my clients I know what I’m talking about, and that I’m there for them on a personal level. So many seniors are unaware of what they could and should do to protect themselves and their loved ones.”
He recommends ticking the boxes on these six pro-active steps:
- Beneficiaries: Be sure you have named current beneficiaries on your investment accounts, life insurance policies, IRAs and 401K accounts.
- Set up POD (pay on death) on your bank accounts, or create a separate checking account with a trusted child or sibling to meet the financial needs upon your death, while your estate is being settled.
- Probate or revocable trust? Decide now how you wish your estate to be handled.
- Select a Certified Elder Law attorney to learn more about your options and to be certain all your paperwork is up to date and meets the requirements of the state in which you reside. If you moved within the past several years, you may not have a valid will.
- Locum tenens: Consider adding a trusted resource person to a bank account so they are able to write checks for you in case you become incapacitated at some future date. Sudden illness and accidents can be difficult enough without accumulating unpaid bills and other expenses.
- Learn about Hospice in your location if you are failing, or a loved one is facing death. They can do much to support you and your family through these difficult times.
Increasing Retirement Income
Besides part-time or even full-time gigs, The Motley Fool suggests a dozen ways to generate more retirement income — with number eight being a reverse mortgage. For seniors facing health challenges, this can be one of the better forms of “health insurance,” because if someone opts for a line of credit (HELOC) they need only “pay for it” (i.e., activate the loan) when they need the money. If Lynne FitzGerald had had such information, perhaps she would still have her home today.
A Question of Balance
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Continue readingWhat’s Your Kindness Quotient?
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Continue readingElder Orphans: Ending the Isolation
We call children “orphans” if they lose their parents, but don’t tend to associate this description with people at the other end of the life spectrum. And while foster care exists to help the young, seniors are on their own as “elder orphans.”
An elder orphan is someone with no spouse/companion, children, or other close relatives to rely on for friendship and support. Of course, having family members is no guarantee of assistance in one’s later years. But starting from solo can makes it that much more challenging to age in place.
One woman wrote, “I truly experienced the ‘elder orphan’ dilemma during my recent surgery. I had to use a voluntary car service to get to the hospital only to find out the ride was not able to bring me home. I didn’t tolerate the surgery as well as had been anticipated, so I ended up being admitted because there wasn’t anyone to care for me overnight.”
Beyond our physical needs, social isolation and loneliness are detrimental to our health. Isolation is as bad as smoking, and in many ways worse.
Remote Rescue
To address the needs of the growing ranks of elder orphans, SeniorCare.com editor Carol Marak started an Elder Orphans Facebook group in 2016 that rapidly swelled to over 5000 members in just one year. The community, connection and support are proving invaluable to seniors in myriad situations. The group addresses such topics as:
- How to select a health care proxy
- How to prepare for surgery
- How to prepare your home for a speedy recovery when family’s not around
- How to celebrate special occasions alone
- How to ask for support
- Learning to deal with stressful situations
- Form local support groups and meeting face-to-face
- Helping one another find local services, transportation, and affordable housing.
One of the most critical areas, of course, is how seniors without a support system will handle the day-to-day aspects of aging alone. For those aging in place, the Facebook group suggests:
- House sharing, e.g., exchanging a room in your home with a student or other able-bodied person for an agreed-upon number of hours of assistance, whether that’s running errands, preparing and sharing meals, accompanying the senior to appointments, etc. This can work well with a college student or other person, young or retired, who may have more time than money. It’s a precursor of sorts to caregiving, for someone who is still independent yet could use a little help as well as companionship. In the Netherlands, students live free in nursing homes in exchange for thirty hours a month of senior service — not as caregivers, but as friends. It’s a mutually rewarding model.
- Aging in community. A step beyond home sharing, co-housing and cooperatives are alternative ways for elder orphans to live surrounded by others. An elder orphan might also consider moving to an inter-generational community where elders are cared for as part of the community mission.
Seeing AI to Eye
While digital assistance is no substitute for human contact, of course, services in the cyber age can go a long way towards alleviating loneliness and isolation. One resource is Uniper Care Technologies‘ mobile app that turns an older adult’s TV into a connected solution for social engagement, medical monitoring, home maintenance and entertainment. It integrates well with an aging in place model that presupposes interested others, whether relatives, friends or new digital allies, are also available to lend vital virtual support.
Japan, where more than a fourth of the population is 65+, is at the forefront of AI for seniors, with inventions such as Robear, a friendly-featured ursine pal that can literally do the heavy lifting for a solo senior, gently depositing someone from bed to chair.
Then there’s MiRo, a robotic dog that functions like a trained service animal. Described as a “biomimetic companion,” it watches for a break in routine and then, just like a real service dog, will try talking to the senior to ensure she’s OK. If there seems to be a problem, MiRo will send a signal to the home speaker, which will broadcast the inquiry again, telling the elder to slap her wrist. If the senior doesn’t respond, the signal contacts an emergency response team. And while MiRo never needs to be walked or fed, he’s a bit like a live canine: both buddy and guardian, keeping an eye out for his human friend.
Celebrating Life, Not Death
Some elder orphans worry about who will be there to handle their death and funeral arrangements. One writer, herself on the elder orphan trajectory, suggests your elder orphan HECM clients plan ahead, as we’ve covered before.
The best perspective comes from one LO’s reverse mortgage client, an elderly woman who was quite ill and not expected to live much longer. Together with her family, she helped plan her own funeral. However, once her affairs were in order, she recovered — and decided it would be much more fun to have a “Celebration of Life” instead of a funeral, so she could enjoy the festivities. While “Life Celebration” is often used as a euphemism for a memorial service, this woman turned the idea on its ear and participated in a joy-filled day that honored her long and eventful life.
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Continue readingThe Eyes Have It
We’ve covered seniors and hearing loss, including the incredible regenerative benefits of music for brain health. There are even technologies that help senior living communities keep residents engaged with hearing assistance that adjusts individual sound for multiple residents simultaneously — a real boon considering that by age 85, 80 percent of people have some degree of hearing loss.
But aside from exhorting seniors to get their eyes checked, visual stimulation hasn’t been addressed with the same vigor. Until now.
AI Vision
NuEyes, profiled here, functions like digital hearing aids for the eyes, and is certainly a blessing for those with low vision. However, it’s still a pricey out-of-pocket expense for someone who relies on Medicare or other insurance to cover health care costs (unless they have a HELOC or HECM, which might be an excellent resource to tap for health restoration until wearable technology becomes a reimbursable expense.)
Similarly, Oculus, a virtual reality company that Facebook founder Mark Zuckerberg bought in 2014, could soon enable a doctor sitting in San Francisco to see patients in a clinic in Kenya. The VR headgear would allow the user to move around and interact with people in the distant environment, participating in research, treatment — possibly even surgery. Impressive.
A fully immersive experienceÂ
While these visual breakthroughs are very valuable, they don’t directly address the need of seniors who are homebound or unable to travel, and longing to see the sights they remember from years gone by, even just the everyday experiences they can no longer physically access: movies, museums, concerts. Or maybe they long to attend their granddaughter’s college graduation, taking place in a far-flung locale.
Enter Jake Kahana, a New York-based designer and film director who recognizes that while VR is a hot button for Millennials, seniors are the fastest-growing population cohort, and are much more likely than their grandchildren to become armchair travelers. So Kahana created BettVR With Age, a series of VR films that explores how we can use virtual reality to improve the quality of life for seniors and people with limited mobility.
He began with immersive research, visiting centers such as DOROT, a non-profit organization whose goal is to alleviate social isolation and provide concrete services to older adults, in order to discover what seniors might find useful in a VR experience. MIT startup Rendever, which helps seniors living in care facilities “relive, reconnect, and re-inspire”, supplied the software.
Days of Future Past
Kahana then created ten films, from a violin concert to a dance rehearsal, a World War II-era theatre performance to a museum tour. Combined with Google Maps’ VR app, Kahana was able to “send” bedbound 78-year-old Craig Palmer to Amsterdam, Stonehenge (a favorite vacation site of his), and a stretch of Broadway where the former singer and actor lived and worked for many years. He was even able to poke his head backstage at an Upper West Side nightclub he often visited — all without leaving his apartment.
After the fifteen-minute VR excursion down memory lane concluded and Kahana removed the headset, he asked for Palmer’s feedback. Ever the actor, Palmer grinned and replied, “It was awesome. But it would be better if I had a scotch.”
More Than Fun and Games
And virtual reality offers more than just a good time. It can be a game-changer for senior health and mood, which may be especially helpful for your reverse mortgage clients and prospects who are choosing to age in place.
Dennis Lally, co-founder of Boston-based Rendever, says VR is being studied as a way to reduce pain, anxiety, stress and social isolation. “With VR, it’s now possible to track the human interaction with virtual tasks and leverage virtual reality analytics to measure the success of these activities.” Massachusetts General Hospital is in the process of testing Rendever for such outcomes.
In San Francisco, physician Sonya Kim developed Aloha VR to help depressed and agitated patients to a better quality of life. She’s witnessed violent dementia patients become more relaxed after using VR.
Finally, VR headsets are making significant inroads into long-term-care facilities. The resident engagement director at one assisted living and memory care community reports, “Five minutes after they try VR, they are so stimulated. It’s a mood changer. They are laughing and smiling and engaged.”
Rendever is now in more than 30 senior facilities; by year-end 2017, they plan to be in several hundred nationwide. And it might be just the ticket for a HECM client who, while happy the HECM allows her to remain at home as she ages, would dearly love to do some armchair traveling.
What are your thoughts? Please leave your input in the Comments section below, and share this post on social media using the Twitter, Facebook and LinkedIn icons at the top of this page. Thank you!
The Gig Is Up: How Elders Can Bloom in the Freelance Marketplace
Once upon a 1099, it was called freelancing. The newest catchphrase is “gig economy“. But however one refers to flexible, part-time, independent contractor work, it seems seniors are piloting the ship: since 1995, those aged 55-75 with a bachelor’s degree or higher have been more likely than other groups to choose alternative work arrangements. With the explosion of the aging population, this growth in self-employment has also accelerated.
Tapping till we’re tapped out?
People of every age, especially independent-minded Millennials, are less inclined to remain in a job they dislike than were previous generations. In fact, even in a climate of business uncertainty, more than two million Americans quit their jobs every month, according to the Bureau of Labor Statistics. Yet the national unemployment rate continues to drop; it was just 4.4 percent as of June 2017. Perhaps gigging has something to do with it?
The gig economy makes sense for seniors on many levels. People are tired of the tired maxims about pushing the envelope — though these days, the motto might more accurately be, “tapping till you’re tapped out”. Our sports-derived business metaphors all focus on more: go the distance, hit it out of the park, feel the burn. In a full-time job, this often means working well beyond an 8-hour day or a 40-hour week.
Consistent overtime can lead to more than a metaphorical sports injury, however. Employees who regularly attempt to knock it out of the park in the 13th inning can experience burnout, something an older adult definitely doesn’t need. But they do need money, and if they haven’t saved enough to retire without worry, trudging unhappily to work each day may seem like the only answer.
Unless they decide to gig.
If your reverse mortgage prospects — or their children, who may be in late middle age themselves — aren’t “feeling the burn” in a positive way (e.g., from healthy exercise), it may be time to discover how to become a just-in-time staffer, part of the agile workforce, the sharing economy. By seeking and aggregating a number of short-term, temporary assignments, someone could earn a respectable income, minus the yoke of a full-time job that’s long past its prime — even if the person gigging is well into her 70s or beyond.
Some studies estimate that by 2020, 43 percent of the American workforce will consist of independent contractors. That’s just three short years away. And it’s going to be fueled by “unretired” elders: a new breed of seniors who are continuing to work in their current professions beyond typical “retirement age” — or opting to start new careers.
One major upside of gigging for seniors? By not putting all their eggs in one basket, they eliminate the risk of being downsized out of the job they depend on — a real blow if someone has been a loyal employee, working for the same company for 20, 30 or 40 years.
There are even job sites that specialize by industry, so a senior can find their gig economy niche. Do you know a senior who’s a retired attorney? Upcounsel provides on-demand lawyers to business. Or maybe someone has been a photographer or musician, and rather than continue in these roles directly, they would like to mentor others. At Skillshare, teachers hold online classes using skills they’ve acquired throughout their life — and Skillshare experts aren’t required to have a degree. Here’s a list of 20 platforms in the gig economy.
Clearly, it’s easier than ever to market yourself and your talent, without burning the candle until you’re burned out. Since many people who leave their “regular” job in their 60s will have another 20-30 or more of years of life ahead of them, gigging may be an ideal way to supplement a HECM — and keep elders active, actively engaged, learning while earning, and enjoying creative encore careers.
What are your thoughts? Please leave your input in the Comments section below, and share this post on social media using the Twitter, Facebook and LinkedIn icons at the top of this page. Thank you!
Are You Sure It’s Dementia? Paving New Neural Roads
Scientist, yogi and author Lisa Genova, who wrote Still Alice, shares some encouraging words for brain health. While we can’t change our genes or prevent aging (yet!), restorative sleep is “like a power cleanse for the brain,” as is regular exercise and good nutrition.
These are basics we’ve heard for years, of course. But putting them into practice is something many people may not take seriously until they’re old enough for a reverse mortgage. A witty 93-year-old TEDx presenter suggests bodybuilding in old age is a great idea for precisely this reason. And if you start in your youth, you might be as limber as this incredible gymnast at 91!
Before It’s Clinical
However, the amyloid plaque that leads to Alzheimer’s disease begins accumulating in our brains 15-20 years before clinical symptoms appear. So keeping our brains healthy needs to begin in early middle age, if not sooner.
Here are some of the myriad posts in which we’ve discussed dementia, memory care, and brain health:
Medication — Or Meditation? Om-ing our way to mental health.
50th Birthday Reset: When medications block new brain cell formation, depression and pain remain.
I Knew You Looked Familiar: Traumatic brain injuries (TBI) can mimic Alzheimer’s.
Thanks for the Memories: Creative ways to keep our brains bright.
Women in their sixties are more than twice as likely to develop Alzheimer’s over the course of their lives as they are to develop breast cancer. And with the onset of mild cognitive impairment, women’s cognitive decline is twice as fast men’s. Alzheimer’s activist Maria Shriver asks, “Why aren’t more people interested in this? This is the biggest health crisis in the world… It bankrupts families faster than any other disease.”
All of which is good reason to make every effort to protect our aging brains. But there’s a larger issue that is often overlooked: misdiagnosis.
Dementia Masquerade
How easy is it to assume an older person has dementia, when it might actually be a vitamin or mineral deficiency? Absorption of nutrients declines with age. An elder exhibiting cognitive impairment may need B12 injections, more sun exposure (Vitamin D) or other nutrients. In such cases, “dementia” is reversible once the problem is properly diagnosed and remedied.
A serious health issue could also compromise a senior’s mental acuity: in her final months, my mother was not the woman I knew, although strangers (even the doctors unfamiliar with who and how she had been) did not detect it. Congestive heart failure, a series of falls, and a medication cocktail combined to alter her brain chemistry and function. She wasn’t as mentally sharp as she had been. But it was not dementia.
Similarly, in an elderly person the symptoms of a urinary tract infection can express as brain fog/confusion, which can lead to an erroneous dementia diagnosis — and a painful, untreated bladder infection.
Medication (such as chemotherapy) that blocks the formation of new brain cells can keep a person depressed and in pain, which can seem like a slide into dementia. This can become a causal circle: loss and loneliness tend to increase with age. Loneliness, and the lack of mental stimulation and emotional connection, increases the risk of heart disease and other physical and mental health problems. The result can be depression, and later dementia, if family members or caregivers are not paying close attention.
Finally, Parkinson’s disease, a long-term degenerative disorder of the central nervous system, can cause dementia symptoms. While dementia only becomes widespread in advanced stages of Parkinson’s, depression and anxiety are more common complications, and can escalate mental decline.
Inquiry Can Save An Elder’s Sanity
At the library recently, an older gentleman seated in the new book browsing area smiled at me as I turned from the shelves. He was beaming, so I stopped to ask, “What is it?” He replied, “I’m an artist, and I was sketching your form in my mind as you browsed the books.” He tapped his head, “It’s all up here.” Deeply moved, I took his hand and told him, “That’s one of the sweetest compliments anyone’s ever given me. What’s your name?” He told me his name, and just as we were getting into a conversation, a young woman rushed over and said, “Don’t tell her your Social Security number!”
Nonplussed, I thanked him again and turned to leave. After checking out my books, I saw the woman (out of his line of vision), beckoned her over and asked, “Are you his caregiver? When she said yes, her concern suddenly made sense. I asked, “Does he have dementia”? She said, “Yes, it’s in the early stages.” I told her our conversation had seemed perfectly normal, and that the only reason he was talking to me at all was because I initiated it. She said, “Well, a week ago he met another veteran and invited him over to the house; he told him his address!” Which struck me as reasonable behavior for someone — especially an older man — who was excited to make a new friend.
I cautioned her about being too quick to assume it’s dementia, and said I hoped his daughter, with whom he lives, had consulted a geriatrician (a physician who specializes in elder care). The 37-year-old caregiver no doubt saw this 86-year-old as elderly and infirm. But at my present life stage (and having had a lifelong friend live to 101), he didn’t strike me as particularly “old” — and certainly not addled.
Whenever possible, make sure your HECM clients’ family members are cognizant of the dementia impersonators that could be lurking in an older loved one’s life. By educating themselves, they may be able to restore a senior’s mental health — and maintain everyone’s sanity.
What are your thoughts? Please leave your input in the Comments section below, and share this post on social media using the Twitter, Facebook and LinkedIn icons at the top of this page. Thank you!
And In The End…
We’ve explored death and dying issues a number of times:
Death, Be Not Proud
The Final Frontier: Saying Yes to Death
Facing the Inevitable with Grace and Wit
Preparedness: Shedding New Light on the “D” WordÂ
…but there are always new wrinkles as technology matures along with the population. Startup Aspire Health has garnered significant attention and capital for its “death-predicting algorithm,” which identifies patients at risk of dying within a year. Their intent is to provide palliative care to seniors at home and in senior living communities, in order to maintain quality of life and reduce the cost of care by preventing unnecessary hospitalizations.
That’s an admirable objective. The question is, since the company contracts with health systems and payers, such as Medicare Advantage and Medicaid managed care plans, is such a prediction helping to ensure better end-of-life care — or invading patient privacy?
A Noble Goal, with Caveats
While the issue of care vs. privacy is important to address, a “good death” such as what Aspire caregivers aspire to provide, remains rare in Western culture. Our technological advances invite a difficult inquiry: should we keep someone alive simply because we can? There is a propensity to prolong life at all costs, even when it’s clear the person in question is on a downward spiral.
As Harvard Medical School professor, surgeon and author Atul Gawande asserts in his compelling book, Being Mortal: Medicine and What Matters in the End: “The waning days of our lives are given over to treatments that addle our brains and sap our bodies for a sliver’s chance of benefit. They are spent in institutions — nursing homes and intensive care units — where regimented, anonymous routines cut us off from all the things that matter to us in life. Our reluctance to honestly examine the experience of aging and dying has increased the harm we inflict on people and denied them the basic comforts they most need.”
Gawande’s thesis, like the Aspire Health focus, is spot-on, except… patients do not necessarily conform to medical predictions. There are numerous cases (some of whom have written their own bestsellers) of people at death’s door who experience complete remission and outlive their predicted demise by years, even decades, despite and with their “disease” and/or symptoms.
Comfort, Care, Compassion
Of course, if seniors know when they’re going to die, perhaps it would light a fire under procrastinators in terms of life planning. And then, opting out of the prevailing medical model, they could “go gentle into that good night” in the fullness of time.
Positive change is on the near horizon. Hospitals provide “Comfort Kits” for sick children; people at other end of life deserve the same consideration. The National Institute on Aging’s Providing Comfort at the End of Life is a useful guide you may wish to share with the families of reverse mortgage clients and other seniors in your sphere who want to give someone approaching the end a peaceful, compassionate death.
The site covers a range of physical, mental, emotional and spiritual issues, as well as practical matters such as questions to ask the person’s physician, and how to support the primary caregiver. There is also a list of links to hospice and palliative care, pain medicine, music therapy, and even a site, What Matters Now, to help the families of those facing serious illness create their own blog to keep loved ones informed.
Wishing Can Make It So
If, like many people, the HECM senior or his/her family members are reluctant to broach the unmentionable, there’s an innovative way to get the ball rolling: Go Wish, a card game (in multiple languages) that helps people begin the end-of-life discussion. It’s a good companion tool to The Conversation.
Dr. Christopher Kerr, Chief Medical Officer at The Center for Hospice and Palliative Care in Buffalo, New York, gave this compelling TEDx Talk. He observes that while those in the process of dying might have depleted bodies, their spiritual lives have become rich. Emotionally, a deep peace envelops people as they approach the end.
Another palliative care physician thinks “death ed” ought to start in high school, so she developed and taught such a class this year, using Go Wish to help students jump into the subject matter. Introducing death discussions early on, when the topic is theoretical rather than imminent, may help reduce someone’s fear and resistance to having such crucial conversations later in life.
What are your thoughts? Please leave your input in the Comments section below, and share this post on social media using the Twitter, Facebook and LinkedIn icons at the top of this page. Thank you!